It’s a subject that’s close to many peoples hearts, because it involves relationships; trust and loyalty in one another. Sometimes we find ourselves in a situation where we feel powerless over other people, even though it’s completely unnecessary.
Wishing power over others is a mean expression of the ego at play.
What do you do, when every time that you speak to a friend or an acquaintance you feel as if you’re being asked too much from, or that you really don’t have any say in any of the matters discussed.
What about the times that you express yourself freely, only to find out that the other person didn’t care at all, and still wants to have its way? Such a heartbreaking experience!
What exactly is your power?
If we really look at the deeper meaning of the word power, and how it interconnects with our own lives, we tend to come to a conclusion that power is associated with ego, and that there is no necessity to be in power at all. But, that’s not the type of power we’re looking at here.
We’re inspecting the power that we have behind our own life experiences, and the power that we have within ourselves to create the life experiences that we want to experience, in some cases – the experiences that we need to experience. In which case, we can appreciate that everything is part of the bigger learning experience.
What does it mean to give away power?
In order to understand this, we need to fully accept the fact that we’re feeling powerless in some areas of our lives, and as I have learned over time – majority of the time these areas are closely related to relationships, friendships or other areas of similar, emotional, nature.
It will be easier to understand with some examples:
- By giving away our power, we hope that the other person will find it in themselves to accept us for what we are, yet the person taking over your power is already aware of the fact that you’re vulnerable — and so it happily remains in that state of overpowering you.
- In family relationships, we could get accustomed to one of the relatives having deep affection for us, but any time we may want to make individual decisions, suddenly there is an experience of loss; and more often than not, we give away our power so as not to feel guilty.
In the most simplest of terms, it might be ourselves who are lacking love for ourself, so we’re trying to find it elsewhere; in ways that are self-destructive. Which leads us to next question.
Why do we give away our power?
It seems as if giving away power consciously isn’t even possible, at least not to the extent where we understand that we’re doing harm to ourselves in the favor of something else. So, it almost seems as if our decision to give away that which is ours, comes from an unconscious decision that might be associated with fear, lack of love, even hatred — hidden — in some cases.
Sure, it’s difficult to let go of things, especially if we’re talking about letting go of friends, the past as a whole, even material things that we’ve gotten accustomed to. Imagine — how difficult it is going to be for the generation of technology to get accustomed to living a more nature bound, self-love oriented life; everyone’s time will come.
How do we regain our power back?
The big question, of course, is how do we regain our power once we’ve given it away?
You can always take the direct path and work your way through affirmations, which are highly recommended and work wonders in peoples lives, including mine.
But what if you need a little more insight? What if you feel like you’re stuck, and unsure of what to do?
The best thing that you can do first and foremost, is to actually accept, acknowledge and see the pattern that you’ve created for yourself — for what it is, not for what it is doing to your life, but for what it is.
Are you constantly giving away power to selfish friends, or disrespectful acquittances? Are your work colleges mistreating you and you feel as if you have no choice in the matter?
It all comes from within. If we want to change the external world, we need to go deep into the internal and see what is really going on.
And believe me when I speak of going inside, as I’ve had to deal with such experiences for the most part of my life, clearly to be able to help you in overcoming the same problems.
The essentials are always about identifying the problem. If you can identify what is causing you to give away your power in the first place, you’ve solved two/thirds of the problem just like that.
Because at that moment, when you fully accept and embrace that you’re essentially creating the experiences that you have, you realize that it is within you — which is where you reclaim your power — to do better, to have more, and to have say over the experiences that you need to have in order to live a more fulfilled and happy life.